The "Gardner Minshew" Memorial Thread of Whatever

[HisRoyalSweetness]

There has to be some sort of filter on this thread. My wife walked past as I was scrolling through it. I'm pretty sure she's pregnant now.

I heard Mrs TMP bought a pregnancy test kit. Not for her, but for her husband.

[mmmc_35]

There has to be some sort of filter on this thread. My wife walked past as I was scrolling through it. I'm pretty sure she's pregnant now.

I heard Mrs TMP bought a pregnancy test kit. Not for her, but for her husband.

TMP is pregnant? Congrats. It's 2024 so that makes more sense then one would wish.

[Rakshir]

This is the best thread on the board

[The Marshall Plan]

This is the best thread on the board

I completely agree.

In fact, I think @UOK should pin this to the top of the forum.

[UOK]

This is on you all to keep this thread active. Let it prove itself.

[mmmc_35]

This is on you all to keep this thread active. Let it prove itself.

I think it's well proven.

[UOK]

This is on you all to keep this thread active. Let it prove itself.

I think it's well proven.

This is like 1/10th of what the Fields megathread got to, so once it becomes that kind of fixture, I'll sticky.

[dplank]

I think it's well proven.

This is like 1/10th of what the Fields megathread got to, so once it becomes that kind of fixture, I'll sticky.

TMP's keyboard is already sticky

[Arkansasbear]

There has to be some sort of filter on this thread. My wife walked past as I was scrolling through it. I'm pretty sure she's pregnant now.

Upside:
If you play your cards right, your son could be making billions as an NFL QB in 30 yrs.

Might even be able to get a decent chuck in the form of child support while the kid is in school.

[The Marshall Plan]

This is like 1/10th of what the Fields megathread got to, so once it becomes that kind of fixture, I'll sticky.

TMP's keyboard is already sticky

Weird thingsssssssss happen when I startttttttt talking about Gardner Minshewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

[Arkansasbear]

@The Marshall Plan have you bothered to try and determine how awesome this team would have been had we signed Minshew and traded the 1.1 for a massive haul??

It may be buried in here already but I'm sure you can give me the Cliff Notes of it quicker than I could find it.

[UOK]

This is like 1/10th of what the Fields megathread got to, so once it becomes that kind of fixture, I'll sticky.

TMP's keyboard is already sticky

[The Marshall Plan]

@The Marshall Plan have you bothered to try and determine how awesome this team would have been had we signed Minshew and traded the 1.1 for a massive haul??

It may be buried in here already but I'm sure you can give me the Cliff Notes of it quicker than I could find it.

Serious Comment:

It has been shown that Minshew has better stats than Trevor Lawrence however Minshew signed for a 2 year, $25M contract with the Raiders.

When we traded the 1 to the Panthers last year we received:

2 First round draft picks (The Carolina pick was the #9 overall in 2023.)
2 Second round draft picks
1 DJ Moore

Caleb Williams was a much more hyped up prospect than anybody from last year. So what's he worth? Depends on the trade partner.

My ideal trade target was the Raiders. The Raiders had the 13th pick. We'd be trading away a better quality QB prospect to drop further down in the 1st than we did with Carolina so the price goes up.

3 First round draft picks
2 Second round draft picks
1 Maxx Crosby

There would be all kinds of options with that 13 pick. Odunze would be gone, but you could take another WR. There were a couple of DTs there. You could trade down again and still draft a WR.

Maxx Crosby easily makes the defense top 5 and maybe even the best in the league.

Minshew is a good QB. He's not going to lose you games either. When he was the full time starter at Jacksonville he lit it up. He's been at least good everywhere.

So imagine having the league's best defense with an above average or average QB along with Moore, Allen, Rookie WR, and Kmet.

#1 defense plus easily an above average offense along with an overflowing cupboard of draft picks for the next two years.

How is that not a contending team?

[otis]

This is like 1/10th of what the Fields megathread got to, so once it becomes that kind of fixture, I'll sticky.

TMP's keyboard is already sticky

Damn that's funny and pretty disturbing too. Perfect for this thread.

[Arkansasbear]

@The Marshall Plan have you bothered to try and determine how awesome this team would have been had we signed Minshew and traded the 1.1 for a massive haul??

It may be buried in here already but I'm sure you can give me the Cliff Notes of it quicker than I could find it.

Serious Comment:

It has been shown that Minshew has better stats than Trevor Lawrence however Minshew signed for a 2 year, $25M contract with the Raiders.

When we traded the 1 to the Panthers last year we received:

2 First round draft picks (The Carolina pick was the #9 overall in 2023.)
2 Second round draft picks
1 DJ Moore

Caleb Williams was a much more hyped up prospect than anybody from last year. So what's he worth? Depends on the trade partner.

My ideal trade target was the Raiders. The Raiders had the 13th pick. We'd be trading away a better quality QB prospect to drop further down in the 1st than we did with Carolina so the price goes up.

3 First round draft picks
2 Second round draft picks
1 Maxx Crosby

There would be all kinds of options with that 13 pick. Odunze would be gone, but you could take another WR. There were a couple of DTs there. You could trade down again and still draft a WR.

Maxx Crosby easily makes the defense top 5 and maybe even the best in the league.

Minshew is a good QB. He's not going to lose you games either. When he was the full time starter at Jacksonville he lit it up. He's been at least good everywhere.

So imagine having the league's best defense with an above average or average QB along with Moore, Allen, Rookie WR, and Kmet.

#1 defense plus easily an above average offense along with an overflowing cupboard of draft picks for the next two years.

How is that not a contending team?

We still had our pick at 9 and would have landed Odunze. The draft would have unfolded the same with the exception of Williams going to the Raiders in your plan.

[The Marshall Plan]

Serious Comment:

It has been shown that Minshew has better stats than Trevor Lawrence however Minshew signed for a 2 year, $25M contract with the Raiders.

When we traded the 1 to the Panthers last year we received:

2 First round draft picks (The Carolina pick was the #9 overall in 2023.)
2 Second round draft picks
1 DJ Moore

Caleb Williams was a much more hyped up prospect than anybody from last year. So what's he worth? Depends on the trade partner.

My ideal trade target was the Raiders. The Raiders had the 13th pick. We'd be trading away a better quality QB prospect to drop further down in the 1st than we did with Carolina so the price goes up.

3 First round draft picks
2 Second round draft picks
1 Maxx Crosby

There would be all kinds of options with that 13 pick. Odunze would be gone, but you could take another WR. There were a couple of DTs there. You could trade down again and still draft a WR.

Maxx Crosby easily makes the defense top 5 and maybe even the best in the league.

Minshew is a good QB. He's not going to lose you games either. When he was the full time starter at Jacksonville he lit it up. He's been at least good everywhere.

So imagine having the league's best defense with an above average or average QB along with Moore, Allen, Rookie WR, and Kmet.

#1 defense plus easily an above average offense along with an overflowing cupboard of draft picks for the next two years.

How is that not a contending team?

We still had our pick at 9 and would have landed Odunze. The draft would have unfolded the same with the exception of Williams going to the Raiders in your plan.

Great catch. That was a huge oversight on my part.

So then we take Odunze at 9 and then we presumably wind up with BPA at 13.

[RichH55]

@The Marshall Plan have you bothered to try and determine how awesome this team would have been had we signed Minshew and traded the 1.1 for a massive haul??

It may be buried in here already but I'm sure you can give me the Cliff Notes of it quicker than I could find it.

Serious Comment:

It has been shown that Minshew has better stats than Trevor Lawrence however Minshew signed for a 2 year, $25M contract with the Raiders.

When we traded the 1 to the Panthers last year we received:

2 First round draft picks (The Carolina pick was the #9 overall in 2023.)
2 Second round draft picks
1 DJ Moore

Caleb Williams was a much more hyped up prospect than anybody from last year. So what's he worth? Depends on the trade partner.

My ideal trade target was the Raiders. The Raiders had the 13th pick. We'd be trading away a better quality QB prospect to drop further down in the 1st than we did with Carolina so the price goes up.

3 First round draft picks
2 Second round draft picks
1 Maxx Crosby

There would be all kinds of options with that 13 pick. Odunze would be gone, but you could take another WR. There were a couple of DTs there. You could trade down again and still draft a WR.

Maxx Crosby easily makes the defense top 5 and maybe even the best in the league.

Minshew is a good QB. He's not going to lose you games either. When he was the full time starter at Jacksonville he lit it up. He's been at least good everywhere.

So imagine having the league's best defense with an above average or average QB along with Moore, Allen, Rookie WR, and Kmet.

#1 defense plus easily an above average offense along with an overflowing cupboard of draft picks for the next two years.

How is that not a contending team?

I like that we start with "serious statement" and then basically get into wish fulfillment with the Gardner /Lawrence stuff.

I like Gardner - I enjoy this whole thread really - and he was perfectly cromulent last year (3300 Yard, 15 TD to 9 INT and actually a better QBR (ESPN) than his Rookie or Sophomore years - and even a winning Record)

The Lawrence comment is foolish though

[The Marshall Plan]

This is one of the greatest YouTubes I have ever seen.

[The Marshall Plan]

So having had time to reflect upon the greatness of Gardner "Mad Dog" Minshew going on Crosby's show I sit here and I get pissed that the Bears never have charismatic or interesting personalities on the team.

With Crosby and Minshew if we had these two guys I wouldn't give a damn if we were losing. At least we'd be entertaining. These guys are fun as hell.

Where are our fun guys? The guys you'd go fishing with, have a few beers, crack some dirty jokes, eat a pizza with kind of people?

We don't have that and haven't had it in years.

Seriously, trade next year's 1st and a 2nd to get Crosby and Minshew. Make this team fun again.

[Arkansasbear]

So having had time to reflect upon the greatness of Gardner "Mad Dog" Minshew going on Crosby's show I sit here and I get pissed that the Bears never have charismatic or interesting personalities on the team.

With Crosby and Minshew if we had these two guys I wouldn't give a damn if we were losing. At least we'd be entertaining. These guys are fun as hell.

Where are our fun guys? The guys you'd go fishing with, have a few beers, crack some dirty jokes, eat a pizza with kind of people?

We don't have that and haven't had it in years.

Seriously, trade next year's 1st and a 2nd to get Crosby and Minshew. Make this team fun again.

I actually think Cutler is such a guy. While he was playing, he never showed it. he was funny in the reality show with his wife and on Instagram.

Zach Miller is another guy I think fits that bill.

But yeah for the most part it seems like people don't let that side show. Although the videos of DJ make me think he'd be cool dude to hang with.

[The Marshall Plan]

So having had time to reflect upon the greatness of Gardner "Mad Dog" Minshew going on Crosby's show I sit here and I get pissed that the Bears never have charismatic or interesting personalities on the team.

With Crosby and Minshew if we had these two guys I wouldn't give a damn if we were losing. At least we'd be entertaining. These guys are fun as hell.

Where are our fun guys? The guys you'd go fishing with, have a few beers, crack some dirty jokes, eat a pizza with kind of people?

We don't have that and haven't had it in years.

Seriously, trade next year's 1st and a 2nd to get Crosby and Minshew. Make this team fun again.

I actually think Cutler is such a guy. While he was playing, he never showed it. he was funny in the reality show with his wife and on Instagram.

Zach Miller is another guy I think fits that bill.

But yeah for the most part it seems like people don't let that side show. Although the videos of DJ make me think he'd be cool dude to hang with.

But while they’re playing.

Why don’t our guys have cool YouTube channels? Lambos? Mississippi accents? A prison bus? Cool shit?

We get these boring ass guys that show up and do pressers with the talking points and it’s like watching paint dry.

This franchise has no personality at all. No identity.

Its awful.

I need Caleb to buy a full size bus. Cut the top off. Seal it. Make it a giant hot tub and just drive around Chicago with 20 women in it. Stuff like that.

[The Marshall Plan]

I know it’s been awhile since I gave an update on Mad Dog Minshew but my guy is taking care of business already with the Raiders.

https://www.si.com/nfl/raiders/news/rep ... j1vfaa1443

[The Marshall Plan]

Then for those of you with fantasy teams the GOAT looks like quite the pickup.

https://athlonsports.com/nfl/las-vegas- ... er-in-2024

[Arkansasbear]

I actually think Cutler is such a guy. While he was playing, he never showed it. he was funny in the reality show with his wife and on Instagram.

Zach Miller is another guy I think fits that bill.

But yeah for the most part it seems like people don't let that side show. Although the videos of DJ make me think he'd be cool dude to hang with.

But while they’re playing.

Why don’t our guys have cool YouTube channels? Lambos? Mississippi accents? A prison bus? Cool shit?

We get these boring ass guys that show up and do pressers with the talking points and it’s like watching paint dry.

This franchise has no personality at all. No identity.

Its awful.

I need Caleb to buy a full size bus. Cut the top off. Seal it. Make it a giant hot tub and just drive around Chicago with 20 women in it. Stuff like that.

Don't forget Briggs had a Lambo.

[HisRoyalSweetness]

I know it’s been awhile since I gave an update on Mad Dog Minshew but my guy is taking care of business already with the Raiders.

https://www.si.com/nfl/raiders/news/rep ... j1vfaa1443

“I’m told Gardner Minshew has also made quite the impression,” Fowler said. “He’s shown a lot of moxie, going off-script and changing plays in the huddle already."

Minshew in the huddle: "Right fellas, Getsy's called a shotgun run on 4th and inches. (Pauses to run thumb and forefinger around his moustache and smile.) We all know it's a complete turd so what we're going to do is this..."

[The Marshall Plan]

I know it’s been awhile since I gave an update on Mad Dog Minshew but my guy is taking care of business already with the Raiders.

https://www.si.com/nfl/raiders/news/rep ... j1vfaa1443

“I’m told Gardner Minshew has also made quite the impression,” Fowler said. “He’s shown a lot of moxie, going off-script and changing plays in the huddle already."

Minshew in the huddle: "Right fellas, Getsy's called a shotgun run on 4th and inches. (Pauses to run thumb and forefinger around his moustache and smile.) We all know it's a complete turd so what we're going to do is this..."

OMG that's right. GOAT has Getsy as his OC.

I'm not worried. Gardner Minshew has overcome a lot in life and has become an Alpha Male with enough machismo to impregnate the western seaboard with a snap of his fingers. Like a sexual Thanos.

He'll take care of Getsy.

[HisRoyalSweetness]

Gardner Minshew has overcome a lot in life and has become an Alpha Male with enough machismo to impregnate the western seaboard with a snap of his fingers. Like a sexual Thanos.

He's the NFL equivalent of The Fonz.



His main mission in life is to give TMP happy days.

[The Marshall Plan]

If anything ever said, “LAND HERE” to a woman’s crotch it’s Minshew’s mustache so yes it deserves it’s own YouTube video.

[Boris13c]

I think Minshew has found his spot with the Raiders ... they have been a QB away from doing better things for a while now and I think Minshew shores that up quite well

Minshew helping the offense to become solid and Crosby going nuts with the defense makes the Raiders a team to watch this year and I fully expect them to make some playoff noise

and if there is ever a Minshew led Raiders vs Bears in the Super Bowl, I think a particular board member might pass out from nutting too hard

[HisRoyalSweetness]

and if there is ever a Minshew led Raiders vs Bears in the Super Bowl, I think a particular board member might pass out from nutting too hard

It's ironic, if the Bears were ever to sign Minshew that same board member would rapidly go blind and never actually see him play for them!